Mother’s Day post-loss, part 2

“Is there anything I can help you with?”, a store associate asked me. It jolted me a bit because I had no idea how long I had been lingering among the cards. I felt all-too-familiar pangs of vulnerability, embarrassment and isolation bubble up and disrupt the soft storm that was simmering inside my head and heart. When these pangs occur publicly an anxious sensation, which I never feel in other times, arrives and I want it to leave immediately. The associate was courteously doing her job and possibly (likely) sensed that I could use her offer. I wanted her to leave immediately, yet go ahead and tell her why I couldn’t make up my mind. I imagined myself blurting out “Why don’t you have cards for this? Is there anything you can do? Can you write a letter to corporate? Can I?”
Instead I responded as I’ve taught myself to do: With a cold shallow breath rising up from my chest to my throat, mustering all the little strength I have to keep my voice from breaking, I closed the door between us with a brief “no thank you, I’m fine.”

The lie echoed around me. I despise saying that phrase in times like this. My skin felt cold, as it always does when I am cornered into feigning wellness.

“No thank you, I’m fine.”

Author: Pro-Woman, Pro-Voice

Welcome! This is a brand new site with full content forthcoming. Here is a glimpse of our mission: "Pro-Woman, Pro-Voice" is a space created for women who are facing long-term emotional challenges after choosing to have an abortion. This is a *pro-choice* space, and a *secular* one as well. We advocate for women's rights and wellness, meaning our right as women to make our own reproductive choices and caring for our holistic wellness through the phases of our lives. What makes our site unique is that we strongly advocate embracing our right to share our stories which exist along spectrums of regret, grief, trauma, guilt, devastation, confusion, heartbreak, anger or isolation in the aftermath of abortion. We feel that the sparseness of such resources for pro-choice women has trapped us in the grey area and impacted our wellness and freedom as women to be informed and empowered. "Pro-Woman, Pro-Voice" embraces a feminist approach to compassionate support and solidarity. Our goal is to have a space to share, speak, read, listen and receive support for our often overlooked or silenced experiences. (Please note that we, the site's enthusiastic creators, are not clinicians or professional therapists.We are everyday women with extraordinary goals to create a better, more authentic, and more open pro-choice sisterhood of communication in a world that continuously tries to keep us divided, and dividing, over and over and over.) Our utmost wellness in this life and in this world requires us to free ourselves and bond together. This space is for you.

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